After the Royal Sleep-In (part two), we woke to the cruel mumster doing laundry - bwahahaha. She said my times a-comin'. My answer was: NEVER!
We set off on a random advance - well, BearBoy and I *thought* we were being dragged to tea - only to find out we were, in fact, besieging Mary Arden's Farm (Shakespeare's own cruel mumster). It's a real, working medieval farm, and it supplies fresh organic foods to 5 Shakespearean Heritage Site Cafes. I got to see loads of cute animals (little known fact about us kingly types - we love small, fuzzy creatures - UNLESS THEY'RE SPIDERS - more on that in a minute :-( ).
Soon after sighting an adorable fuzzy duckling, we ate a delicious lunch and continued the siege. Some vicious hand-to-hand combat with goats ensued, but we prevailed. Finally, in the last charge, the Intrepid DaddyMan defeated many geese, the cruel mumster stormed the main living area in the complex, and me and BearBoy subdued the pigs. In a sandwich.
Then came our motorized offensive takeover of the Cotswolds. It was a very scenic drive with many sandstone buildings. I was deceived by the name 'Upper Slaughter', thinking it meant the slaughter that was higher than lower the slaughter. Alas no, it was just a village name. I think the cruel mumster's head almost exploded from too much beauty.
I saved my crisps (chips) for our Monopoly game, bragging that only I was wealthy enough to afford them (actually, I saved them from lunch). After I mopped up my chip-less family, I walk into my throne room, and found what looked like a piece of string. Curious, I nudged it. IT WAS NOT STRING: IT WAS A MASSIVE SPIDER!!!! Aarrrrggggghh! I dashed out and said to the Intrepid DaddyMan: "KILL IT. Please." Then, in a very un-kingly fashion, leapt onto the couch and broke into hysterics. I wailed "It crawled over my TOE! MY TOE! AAAHH!!!!!"
The rest is not for public ears or eyes. In other words, censored.
After a goods nights sleep we packed up and headed for our next destination, my personal favourite: